Looking for Love: Talking Dirty in Japanese
By Sara Who
New relationships always come with their share of surprises — some a lot more exciting than others. Yes, you are not imagining things; I am talking about doing the deed, the horizontal tango, hanky panky or whatever you like to call it.
First times are usually exciting, but often nerve-racking. You might be wondering if your experience will differ from the usual, and if language barriers will put a damper on the mood. What can you expect when you want to get frisky with your new Japanese honey?
Thankfully, the bedroom is often an area where the language of love is mostly spoken through gestures rather than words. Even if your Japanese skills are elementary at best, you should be able to navigate your way without the help of a phrasebook.
Unless, that is, you happen to have a particularly vocal partner.
There is no bigger mood killer than a sudden grammar lesson in the throes of passion.
Trust me. I learned it the hard way. Nearing the end of a particularly steamy afternoon, my boyfriend said to me in Japanese: “Tell me to come!”
I was completely stumped. I racked my brains for a minute, but could only come up with a very hesitant and completely un-sexy: “Itte hoshii?” When my boyfriend started giggling instead of well, you know, I knew I’d obviously said the wrong thing. Sometimes, it does pay off to come prepared.
If you want to impress your partner, try some of these expressions next time you get down to business. A word of advice: to attain the desired effect, talking dirty in bed should always be done with confidence. If you can’t pull off these expressions while sounding natural, better stick to your mother tongue for now. I’m sure your partner loves it anyway!
The ABCs of sex in Japanese
- ちんちん (Chinchin) : penis, dick
Some shyer girls might refer to it as “おちんちん” (ochinchin) or “honorable penis” in English, to the delight of males all over Japan.
- まんこ (Manko): vagina, pussy
- おっぱい (Oppai): breasts, boobs
- おおきい (Ookii!): It’s so big! / They’re so big!
Can be used to talk about the male anatomy or breasts.
- すごいきれい! (Sugoi kirei.): You look gorgeous. / They’re gorgeous.
Often used to talk about breasts.
- なめてほしい！ (Namete hoshii!): Lick (or suck) it!
- くすぐったい (Kusuguttai!): It tickles!
- だめ! (Dame!): You can’t! / Don’t do that!
Tread carefully with this one. Depending on the situation, it could actually mean “keep doing that” or “don’t do that.” If you’re not sure, ask. In Japanese porn, girls often try to appear “demure” by saying no at first, even though they really “want it” but are too embarrassed to say. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of role play in the bedroom, as long as both parties are ok with it.
- やめて! (Yamete!): Stop!
- いれてほしい (Irete hoshii!): Put it in! / I want it now!
- なまがいい (Nama ga ii!): Let’s do it bareback!
- なまはだめ (Nama wa dame!): No, let’s use a condom!
- きもちいい (Kimochi ii… ): It feels good….
- ぬれてる (Nureteru!): You’re so wet!
- あったかい (Attakai!): You’re so warm!
- やばい! (Yabai!): It feels amazing!
- がまんして (Gaman shite!): Don’t come yet!
- がまんできない (Gaman dekinai… ): I can’t wait any longer…
- だして! (Dashite!): Come!
- いきそう (Ikisou!): I’m gonna come!
- いく (Iku!): I’m coming!