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Tweet of the Week #128: Creepy Profiles Encountered On Japanese Dating Apps

Don't be this type of guy.

By 3 min read

Dating apps have done well in Japan, where even the government is looking into some AI magic to boost its birth rate. Nowadays, singles, young and old (and free spirits), have all dipped their fingers into the world of online dating.

But not all dates are worth the time or energy. Some may even be creepy enough that you’ll want to delete your app asap.

Akari (@akarirenai77) is a university student who tweeted about her experience with finding a boyfriend after matching with 200 men through dating apps. In a recent tweet, she shared the four worst guys she unfortunately encountered on her journey to find love.

The worst four

わたし実体験じったいけんから紹介しょうかいする

マッチングアプリで出会であったやばい男性だんせいまとめ

“Based on my personal experience, here’s a summary of the worst men I’ve met through dating apps.

  1. 初電話はつでんわ1時間いちじかん嫌味いやみうモラハラ男性
    The moral harasser who made rude remarks for over an hour on our first phone call.
  2. 18歳じゅうはっさい高校生こうこうせい登録とうろくしている
    An 18-year-old high schooler.
  3. はつデートでごはんべにったときわたしの料理りょうり許可きょかなく食べる男性
    The guy who ate my food without asking on our first date.
  4. 偶然ぐうぜんよそうわたしのんでいるいえ最寄もよえきせしている男性
    The guy who ambushed me at the nearest station to my place pretending it was a coincidence.”

Let’s talk about stalking

You may think she just hasn’t given you a chance, but you actually look at creepy as this guy.

The first three profiles are definitely not soulmate material, but the last guy is a potential stalker. Stalking is not specific to Japan, but it became recognized as a serious issue after the murder of Shiori Ino.

Cases such as this led to Japan’s Anti Stalking Act, and since then, authorities have been collecting data. The number of cases has steadily increased since 2002, but it can be a sign that victims feel more and more comfortable to speak up. In 2018, the Japanese police reported 21,556 stalking cases and 87.9% of the victims are women. The Japanese law has roughly defined eight categories of stalking behaviors under the legal expression つきまといとう (following, pursuing, etc.).

Go directly to a central police station and with a friend if possible.

Stalking (ストーカー行為こうい) is characterized by the repetition of these behaviors towards one person. Ambushing you near your home, following you to work, emailing or calling you repeatedly, sending you nasty packages or any other one-sided action displaying the pursuit of an intimate relationship is a criminal offense punishable by imprisonment and fines.

If you believe you are stalked, open up to people you trust. Take note of every event in a chronological journal and protect yourself with these practical tips for dealing with a stalker. If you are comfortable with the idea, contact the Japanese authorities. You can go to your local police box (こうばん), but police have been known not to take stalking seriously. If you feel this is the case, go directly to a central police station and with a friend if possible.

Essential vocabulary to know

Here are the eight categories of stalking behavior and associated vocabulary.

  • Following a person
Japanese Romaji English
つきまとう tsukimatou Follow
せする machibuse suru Ambush
ちふさがる tachifusagaru Block the way
見張みは miharu Guard, watch a place
ける oshikakeru Intrude (a workplace, at school…)
  • Letting a person know they’re being watched
Japanese Romaji English
監視かんしする kanshi suru Monitor
監視される kanshi sareru Being monitored
げる tsugeru Tell (by phone, letter, email…)
  • Request to meet and date
Japanese Romaji English
面会めんかい menkai Meeting
交際こうさい kousai Date
要求ようきゅうする youkyuu suru Request
  • Violent speech and behavior
Japanese Romaji English
怒鳴どなられる donarareru Being yelled at
乱暴らんぼう行動こうどう ranbouna koudou Violent behavior
粗暴そぼう内容ないようのメール sobouna naiyou no meeru Email with rough content
  • Repeat use of communication tools
Japanese Romaji English
無限電話むげんでんわ mugendenwa Silent phone call
連続れんぞくした電話 renzoku shita denwa Consecutive phone call
何度なんども電話をかけてくる nandomo denwa o kaketekuru Make phone calls many times
執拗しつよういやがらせ shitsuyouni iyagarase Relentless harassment
  • Sending offensive package
Japanese Romaji English
汚物おぶつ obutsu Waste, filth
動物どうぶつ死体したい doubutsu no shitai Dead animal
不快ふかい fukai Unpleasant, uncomfortable
嫌悪けんおじょうもよおさせる keno no jyou o moyoossaseru Making one feels disgusted
  • Slander
Japanese Romaji English
中傷ちゅうしょうする chyuushyou suru Slander
名誉めいよきずつける meiyo o kizutsukeru Hurt one’s reputation
  • Sexual misconduct
Japanese Romaji English
わいせつな写真を送る waisetsuna shashin o okuru Send obscene picture
卑わいな言葉を告げる hiwaina kotoba o tsugeru Tell foul words (by phone, letter, message…)

More vocabulary

Japanese Romaji English
実体験じったいけん jittaiken Real experience
出会であ deau Meet
初電話はつでんわ hatsudenwa First phone call
嫌味いやみ iyami Sarcasm
モラハラ morahara Moral harassment
はつデート hatsu deeto First date
偶然ぐうぜん guuzen Coincidence
よそ yosou Pretend
最寄もよえき moyori eki Nearest station

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