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Tweet of the Week #157: Teen Asks Aquarium For Love Advice—Gets an Answer You’d Expect

An ichthyologist probably shouldn't be your go-to guide on love.

By 2 min read

In Japan, businesses value customer feedback so much that stores, supermarkets, museums and aquariums typically have a box asking for customer feedback. There has been a trend lately to turn these suggestion boxes into a sort of therapy box.

The Kyoto Aquarium in Umekoji Park created a special feedback box for patrons to share their problems and worries, such as romance, anonymously. The aquarium staff then reply. However, the advice you may get is not always constructive, as a 16-year old high school student learned after sharing his blues over not meeting a girl.

Fools fall in love

男子だんし高校生こうこうせいなので出会であいが「まったく」ない・・・

“I’m in high school, so I can’t meet anyone at all…”

全くちがうよ: That’s totally different!

Staff from the aquarium’s fish department/team (魚類ぎょるいチーム) replied back with a funny, but not a very helpful solution.

クマノミというさかなはメスがいなくなると一番いちばん大きおおきなオスがメスに性転換せいてんかんします。

女子じょし高校生こうこうせいになってみてはいかがでしょうか?

あたらしいこいはじめましょう!

“When there are no female clownfish, the largest male will change its sex to female. How about becoming a high school girl?

Start a new love life!”

Express ‘truly,’ ‘completely,’ or ‘not at all’ in Japanese

The adverb 全く strongly expresses a state of completion and translates “truly,” completely,” and “really” in English. It’s an emotional word, that conveys the speaker’s strong feelings about something.

  • まったくそのとおりです: I totally agree with you; exactly!
  • 全くちがうよ: That’s totally different!
  • 全くおなじだ: That’s exactly the same!
  • まったく、ショーンさんは!: Come on, Shawn!/ Oh my God, Shawn! (disappointment or exasperation)

全くのばか: A complete fool.

You often find this adverb in a sentence ending in ない, in which case 全く translates “not at all.”

  • 全くらない: I don’t know at all.
  • 全く記憶きおくがない: I do not have any memory at all.
  • 全くそのはなしいたことがない: I haven’t heard about this at all.

It can also be attached to a word with the particle “の.”

  • 全くのばか: A complete fool.
  • 全くのうそ: A complete lie.

Vocabulary

Japanese Romaji English
出会であ deai Encounter
クマノミ kumanomi Clownfish
メス mesu Female
オス osu Male
性転換せいてんかんする seitenkan suru Change sex
~いかがでしょうか ikaga deshou ka How about ~?
あたらしいこい atarashii koi New love

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